QUESTION:
Is confidence in God needed while courting?
ANSWER:
“It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.” [Psalms 118:8]
“For the LORD shall be thy confidence, and shall keep thy foot from being taken.” [Proverbs 3:26]
“Confidence in an unfaithful man in time of trouble is like a broken tooth, and a foot out of joint.” [Proverbs 25:19]
“A man, when he chooses his life companion, he usually inquires of her life, and so forth, and what family she out of, and what's her background, so forth. It's... We have to have something like that to give a--a basis. You ask her. Now, only thing he can take is her word. That's all he can take and that's all she can take from him is his word. And there's no other way.” [Fundamental Foundation For Faith, Chicago, IL 55-0113]
“I've got to know what I'm doing before I can have faith in what I'm doing. Why'd you marry your wife? You had faith in her. You had tried her, watched her, seen what she come from, who she was.” [Questions And Answers On The Holy Ghost, Jeffersonville IN 59-1219]
"A man, now days, getting married. You young fellows, you better pray a long time. Ask God to give you a companion. You young women, the same way, 'cause it is so uncertain.” [Uncertain Sound, Middletown, OH 61-0315]
“How would you go out and pick up... You gentlemen, young men here, would you walk out on the street and pick up a woman and marry her, just because you walked out and picked her up; she was a woman? I don't have much thoughts of your conception I'm sure, but see, first you got to know something about her, where she come from, her character... That's the way with a woman to her husband, the same way. You must think of those things, because it's your lifetime companionship. And this is our eternal life with God or be totally separated and annihilated in hell. It's one or the other. So we want to approach this upon the basis of Scripture, and know where we are, and then you'll have faith to know. If you can see where you're going, then you have faith to go. But if you can't see where you're going (just stumbling through the dark), you don't know what you're doing.” [Abraham's Grace Covenant, Middletown, OH 61-0317]
“You men here, that's married, why did you marry your wife? You had confidence and faith that she'd make a real wife and mother, and so forth. Women, back to your husbands, the same way... Sweethearts are thinking of marriage. You're studying the man you'll marry, or the girl you'll marry. You must have faith in them, or you better not marry them. See?” [Jesus Christ The Same, Grand Prairie, AL 61-0516A]
“How could you ever marry a woman if that young girl had--had--had run out, and done everything, and lived in prostitution, and everything else; and--and yet, you went and got her in the house of prostitution; come out, and she was--she says, "Well, I'll--I'll try to be a--a better girl"? You can't have faith in that woman. See? You can't do it. How can a woman have faith in a man that's did the same thing? You just can't build your faith there; there's nothing to build on. See? You can't do it.” [Wisdom Versus Faith, Jeffersonville, IN 62-0401]
“You, when you got married, there had to wind back through your mind something, till you hit that tie post. And it should have been love for your wife or your husband. Well, maybe she isn't as pretty as John's wife; or she, well... She's not the--this, that, but there's something about her that you--it strikes you. You--you--you say, "She might not be as pretty as the other," or, "he might not be as handsome as the other"; but there has to be a absolute there that that person's different. And there's where you hold on to. And if that isn't there, you better not get married: that tie post, that absolute.” [The Absolute, Jeffersonville, IN 62-1230M]
“Any woman that's going to marry a man, and she's not certain of that man, she'd better leave him alone. And any man that's going to marry a woman, and not certain, you'd better leave her alone. You'd better pray through on it, until God gives you the answer. And then what God joins together let no man put asunder. But we--we... First we must pray through on that. Yes.” [The Trumpet Gives An Uncertain Sound, Phoenix, AZ 63-0114]
“When a young man is going to get married to a young woman, he must know the character of this young woman. Or the young woman must know the character of the young man, something that she can hold to. Will this man be a just man? Will he make me the right type of husband? Will this woman give to me in life what I--what I expect out of her, of loyalty and so forth? And then it's got to be somewhere that they can base their--their vows upon, knowing that there's something that will hold. And that's the reason we bring them to the church, and to the Word of God, to get this absolute tied.” [A Absolute, Houston, TX 63-0304]
“Here just like a young couple. You take a young man and a young woman, and they love--they fall in love with one another. And as they go along and begin to know one another more, their hearts just begin to beat as one. See? They're--they're... Yet they're not husband and wife, but their love binds them together, and they have confidence in one another. Now, if they really love one another, really love, and you know that this girl loves you and--and she knows that you love her, you've got confidence, faith in one another, see, you got faith in one another; if you didn't, you'd better not marry her. See? Notice, you got to have faith. And you separate them and put one in extreme south and one extreme north, there's still that love beats for one another, no matter where they're at. They're just as true to one another as they can be, because they love one another. And if you love the Lord, just not trying to dodge hell, but you love the Lord, then you have faith in God, see, if you love Him.” [Perfect Faith, Jeffersonville, IN 63-0825E]
“I don't believe in mixing marriages. I believe that a white man should not marry a colored girl, or a colored girl marry a white man, or a yellow marry a colored, or a white, or a... I believe the brown, black, white, and races of people are like a flower garden of God, and I do not believe they should be crossed up. I believe that's the way God made them, and I believe that's the way they should remain. What... It fools me that I seen some real pretty colored girl, intelligent, nice looking kid, just as pretty as any woman you'd want to see... What does she want to marry a white man and have mulatto children? What would an intelligent colored girl want with such a thing as that? Is because that something... that communist... And how would a--a fine a-a-a colored man want to marry a white woman and have mulatto children? I don't believe I... I believe you should stay just what we are. We--we're servants of Christ. And God made me... If He made me, my color black, I'd be happy to be a black man for God. If He made me yellow, I'd be a happy yellow man for Christ. If He made me white, I've a--happy white man for Christ. If He made me brown, or red, an Indian, whatever it is, I'd stay my same color. That would be me. I want to be like my Maker made me.” [Questions And Answers, Jeffersonville, IN 64-0830E]
Bible References: Psalm 118:8; Proverbs 3:26; 25:19
[Answer provided by Bro. Ken Andes, Minister, Lynden, Washington]